and i looked up. we had an audience...
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
Randomize
