thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
