no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize
