I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
this boner is exhausting
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
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