Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I'm like, not good at living.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize
