Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
Randomize
