Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
The beer is more important than you right now.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
How my distance relationship is going: he's trying to sext me & I'm stuffing pizza in my face.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
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