I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Randomize
