to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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