cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
I am sitting in my lingerie, eating frozen cookie dough out of a bowl, and watching family. My hump day is going great
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
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