If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
