I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
we're chasing vodka with high fives
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Randomize
