Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
the liver wants what the liver wants
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
