That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
