just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
Randomize
