Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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