She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
