the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
Randomize
