I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize