You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
