I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
Randomize
