I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I'm at taco bell and they have a hiring sign asking "do you like to melt things?" clearly they only want the ambitious.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
But Monday we'll be living in a post-apocalyptic hellscape. Also, I'm going to a champagne tasting.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Randomize
