Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Randomize
