420 ftw
Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Randomize
