Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize