i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
Use "feeling words"
Yay
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize