Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
