New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
