The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Randomize
