a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
