if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
I'm trying real hard to keep it on the DL how drunk I am at lunch with my grandma.
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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