that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
Jason Williams (yeah the ex-nets center...) drunkenly told me that, while drinking, I should take an ambien and a cialis before i go home...that will "give me a 25 minute window to have sex and then goto sleep before the bitch starts bothering me"....
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
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