I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
