Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize