Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
The guy I hooked up with two weeks ago just friended me on Venmo, I honestly won't be mad if he pays me for the sex
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Randomize
