Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Randomize