I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
Randomize
