i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
After getting kicked out of the bar, you proceeded to McDonald's, ordered 30 nuggets, slammed them all back in 5 minutes and then stole 3 traffic cones...how you only got charged with drunk in public is beyond me.
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Randomize
