so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
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