____ banged a stripper...well technically she's now a hooker...
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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