Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
How do you tell if you're on the terrorist watch list?
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
Randomize
