I can't disclose who, but one time I called someone, they didn't pick up, and immediately texted back 'will call later, masturbating'
I thought that was really considerate
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
Also yeah I would definitely have to say that one of my favorite things to do is to get high and pet cats.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
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