If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Randomize
