can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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