I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
i was watching some porn this morning and i realized i am blessed with a truly beautiful vagina
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
i'm way too high for it to be safe that i just discovered i have a fire extinguisher
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
being pregnant is like rehab
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
Randomize
