She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize
