He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
Life is so much better after having sex.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
The one thing I know about living in Vegas is the closest I'll ever come to being a father is singing the theme song from Full House to a garbage can while I eat an entire birthday cake.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
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