i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
