there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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