i just wanna soil my oats bro
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
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