Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Make note: the first date is too soon to make the "condoms are only for making balloon animals" joke.
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Randomize
