too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
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