You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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